I know, I know…. LATE AGAIN!? Well, not quite. You see, this week there will be no Audio Blog. Now before you go and purchase the most expensive gun you can to take me out with, know these two things: (1), I am in the middle of an intense two weeks of teaching in England and, (2), I will be back next week with tons of hilarious anecdotes about my trip, more absurd Freelance Horseshit tales, and all-new jingles that are designed to make you laugh so hard you will vomit through your nose on close friends and family members. So…be patient, be happy, but most of all…. be aware that pawn shops make you wait a minimum of two weeks to obtain handguns---and by then, you'll be too busy laughing at the latest episodes of this stupid blog to even care about kidnapping me, taking me into the woods and leaving me there to die. Trust.
Here we go again, with more nonsensical wackiness from the Caramel Manatee!! How many varieties of KitKat exist? More than you ever wanted to know about this beloved candy, the tragic Michael Jackson story, a bizarre message from a former "Nightmare on Elm Street" star, and my weekly excuse for being late with this blog, all here! Grab a slice of Pumpkin Pie and lose yourself through the looking glass of madness!
Still more ridiculous Horseshit to embolden you on your daily journey of madness! This time, the Starbucks "Red Cup" scandal, meeting a famous Supervillain, and unpopular opinions about the new Star Wars---plus, a stupid 80's pop jingle, all jam-packed into the finest slice of free entertainment available anywhere! Settle down with a platter of cheeseburgers and open yer ears!
It's the post-Halloween Freelance Horseshit Audio Blog! Find out how I spent my magical day, what I think of Disney movies, and what motivated my ill-advised Facebook posting last week…. Yeesh! Lots to discuss, lots to laff at, lots of leftover Kit-Kats to eat!! Grab a package of gross-out Red Vines and listen!
The first in my monthly horror story readings makes its debut, fittingly, on Hallowe'en eve. This nightmarish tale was penned by Orson Scott Card, an author better-known for his science fiction efforts (Ender's Game, Red Prophet), than his horror works; but make no mistake---this packs a wallop. Listen in the dark.
The most important guest EVER makes her debut on this, the 22nd Freelance Horseshit Audio Blog! Babies on planes, a Rockabilly jingle and why this damn blog is so late are all on here! Grab some Ritz crackers and cheddar cheese and take a gander!
Freelance Horseshit! I go off the rails this time with a VERY recent horseshit story of on-set bitchiness, summer camp art breakthroughs, the evil shenanigans of the fairer sex, and a Death Metal jingle! Pull out the brown sugar and cinnamon Pop-Tarts and check it out!
The Freelance Horseshit Audio Blog comes to you chock full o' madness, including (but not limited to) rants about snooty artsy High School girls, online rudeness, which barbecue sauce I prefer and the state of current horror films. Grab a bucket of chicken and open your ears!
Once again, Freelance Horsejunk is back with craaaazy stories of my first experiences with drugs (!), dumb former employees and less-than-awesome moments in my teaching adventures. Enjoy and laff the day away with the Caramel Manatee!
This time, dive into tales of an Earthlink commercial I did---and then was hung up on when I asked for payment; My buddy Michael and I and our bizarre trek into the vast California wilderness in search of the perfect hamburger; 40-year-old horror stories from Cub Scout camp and much more on the greatest audio blog in human history!! You read that right. Enjoy!
Specializing in creature and character design, props, prototypes for toys and model kits, general special effects work, and creature design classes.